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Saturday, June 2nd, 2007
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2:56 pm - AND IT CAME TO PASS
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...THAT A HATE GROUP DID LOG ON TO THE GREAT AND WIDE NET OF INTERS, AND LO, THEY DID FIND THING THAT WERT SORROWFUL UNTO THEM.
AND I, ALPHA AND OMEGA, THE LORD THY GOD, DIDST ROLL MINE GREAT AND TERRIBLE EYES, FOR I CALLETH THAT "TUESDAY" WHEN IT DOST HAPPEN UNTO ME.
IT SHALL BE WRIT THAT I DID CREATE "FREE WILL" AND THOU CANST TAKE IT FROM THESE MY CHILDREN. ALSO, IT SHALL BE KNOWN THAT THE "REVEREND" JERRY FALWELL DOES NOT DWELL IN ANY OF MY MANY MANSIONS.
CANST THOU LOVE ONE ANOTHER? OH, BUT I'M EXPECTED TO?
...IS THE LORD THY GOD GONNA HAFTA MAKE A DISASTER SHAPETH THINE SELVES UP? DO NOT TEMPT ME...
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, November 15th, 2005
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11:20 am - THUS SAYETH ME...
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OKAY. I WILT COME CLEAN BEFORE YOU.
I DON'T HATE SHRIMP. I LOVE SHRIMP. IT IS MOST PLEASING IN MINE OWN SIGHT. I JUST WANT TO SAVE IT ALL FOR MYSELF. FOR I AM A JEALOUS GOD, YADDA YADDA.
CANST THOU FORGIVE ME? AFTER ALL, I DID GIVE UNTO YOU DOMINION OVER ALL ELSE. THOU SHALT CUT ME SOME SLACK.
AND CANST PAT ROBERTSON STOP TAKING MY NAME IN VAIN? I HAVE NOT RETURNED HIS CALLS FOR A REASON, WHICH IS MINE OWN, BUT SHOULDST BE OBVIOUS TO EVEN THE LOWLIEST OF BEINGS...
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, November 1st, 2005
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1:19 pm - All Saints Day - one of those "Me" days you all seem to forget.
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AND IF THOU WILT BUT REMOVE THY CANDLESTICK FROM THINE ARSE, THOU SHALT CALM THYSELF ENOUGH TO SPEAK UNTO ME AND LET ME OFFER UNTO YOU REPENTENCE - FOR I GIVE IT READILY IF THOU WILT BUT CALM THE HECK DOWN AND SPEAK UNTO ME, THUS SAYETH ME.
SIIIIIIGH.
DO YOU KNOW HOW FRUSTRATING IT IS TO HAVE PEOPLE NOT TRANSCRIBE YOUR WORDS PROPERLY? MY GOOD BOOK -- OH, YOU'LL ALL GET A COPY WHEN YOU GET HERE - IT TRANSLATES TO YOUR NATIVE TONGUE AUTOMATICALLY -- IS SOOOO MUCH MORE FUN TO READ, YEA VERILY.
SO. ANY DEBAUCHERY FROM LAST NIGHT THAT THOU WOULDST SPEAK UNTO ME THAT I MAY FREE YOU FROM YOUR SINS? YOU ARE ALL HEDONISTS - SURELY THOU HAST DONE SOMETHING OF WICKEDNESS?
For those that are not of my flock - this comm - wouldst thou speak unto me under the cloak of anonimity? Blessed be thine head and etc. etc.
current mood: BENEVOLENT current music: GOLDDIGGER - KANYE WEST - IT IS CATCHY, THUS SAYETH ME
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(18 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, October 27th, 2005
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3:52 pm
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AND IN THE BEGINNING THERE WAS ME. AND I WAS LONELY. SO I MADE YOU. AND THEN YOU LEFT ME. AND STARTED BICKERING OVER TRIBES AND FOOD AND THE REMOTE. AND I WAS ANGRY. AND I SMOTE MANY OF YOU. WHICH, OKAY, WASN'T THE BEST PLAN. AND I CERTAINLY DIDN'T MEAN TO ENCOURAGE THE LOT OF YOU TO SMITE OTHERS IN MY NAME.
I MEAN... COME ON.
SO. I MADE THE WORLD IN SEVEN, YADDA YADDA. CAN ANYONE TALK TO ME WITHOUT BEGGING FOR MONEY OR FAME OR SOMETHING IMPOSSIBLE? WHAT'S THE SCORE ON THE GAME? RECEPTION UP HERE IS LOUSY...
current music: NOT the Hallelujah chorus. Sooooo tired of that.
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(40 comments | comment on this)
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